The Holidays As They Were Intendant…

Yes, denizens, it’s time once again for me to drop a little holiday geekery on you. I’m returning to my Trek roots this year, with a traditional geeky greeting from the Mistress of All Things Naughty, The Intendant.

Because, really, nothing says holiday cheer quite like an unhinged Bajoran wrapped in a pleather onesie.

Whatever your pleasure might be…whether it’s pleather or tweed or somewhere in between, I wish you the merriest of days, filled with peace, love, and joy.

Photo Fun Friday: CSI: Bajor

Crossing streams again, denizens. This one started about a month ago with a conversation I had online regarding which Star Trek alien Jorja Fox would look best as (yes, my world really is this geeky…and, consequently, this fabulous). I contend it’s Bajoran all the way. Then again, I think nose ridges make anyone look smexy.

I love Bajorans.

Then, yesterday, I may or may not have received several CSI graphic novels in the mail, as I mentioned in my BookBin review of my first CSI comic series. As I casually flipped through said novels to check out the artwork, I started once again to think about how similar in marketing approaches CSI is to Trek. Which got me thinking again about a CSI/Trek crossover (what, you thought I’d forgotten about that request?).

Since I’ve already set a precedent regarding dragging my favorite CSI into other geeky forays, I figured why not? If she can be a vampire investigator, why can’t she be a Bajoran investigator next?

And so I give you…

Buckle up, denizens. It’s bound to get geekier from here…

Marketing Wonder

This is something that’s been driving me crazy for a while now because I think that someone in some PR department somewhere is really dropping the ball on this one.

So the Washington Capitals have this “new” logo. I use quote marks because I’m not really sure how new it is…all I know is that I just started noticing it about a year ago. It’s actually a great logo:

Whoever designed this did a fantastic job of integrating all the major elements into one attractive design. You’ve got the team’s patriotic color scheme (on an eagle, of course, because what could be more patriotic than an eagle?), with the blue on the wings delineating the outline of a “W” for Washington while also forming the baseline for the eagle’s neck ruff and wings, with nice bolts of red for the wing tips. Then there’s the cut-out of the Capitol dome to both form the bottom part of the W and to represent the team’s name, Capitals.

I love this logo. Mainly, though, I love this logo because I think it would make an awesome Wonder Woman logo. Don’t you think?

Here, this is the Caps logo and the current Wonder Woman logo, together:

Not exactly the same, but pretty complimentary. Or how about this? This is the Wonder Woman logo designed for the recent “Flashpoint” series:

That’s more like it! Look at how similar these designs are!!

So what’s the missed marketing opportunity? Well, Lynda Carter lives in the Washington, D.C. area. Who wouldn’t want to see her don the old red, white, and blue one more time for the just American cause of…selling hockey tickets?

Anyone? Just me? Fine. Be that way. You’re all just jealous because you didn’t think of it first…

Cookeh!

My apologies to those who have never paid a visit to that idyllic little vampire haven of Bon Temps, but this silly idea hit me a couple days ago and has been hanging around, waiting for me to do something with it ever since.

Strangely enough, I’m not the first person to want to see a Muppet parody of True Blood:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dAZ1-nF3VI&w=640&h=390]

Weird.

As for my own True Blood viewing, I’m still trying to decide whether or not I want to bother with renting the third season. Maybe. But without the promise of Admiral Ro Forrester showing up, I really don’t see the point. I could just as well pop in my copy of BSG: Razor or one of the TNG episodes with Ensign Ro and probably be way happier. And a happy Loba is a preferred Loba.

Oh, but I do love that surly Bajoran…

Flashback Friday: Idina Menzel

I know what you’re thinking to yourself right now: What the hell, Loba? You’re flashing back to a Broadway actress/songstress who’s hardly older than you are and is still working regularly? Did you mix up the vodka and the water again this morning?

Let me ‘splain. I was going through my previous blog, looking for something else that I was going to post for today’s flashback when I stumbled across a post I wrote back in 2006. It was part of a series of posts I’d written about my spectacular 30th birthday trip to Dublin and London. In fact, I’ve already re-posted one entry from that series in a previous Flashback Friday.

[Loba Tangent: Don’t you sometimes feel like this series needs a recap voice-over? “Previously, on Flashback Friday…”]

Anyway, when I came across this post, I paused long enough to read it…and by the end, I was grinning like such a goofy fool that I decided I needed to re-post it today instead of doing the post that I had originally intended (don’t worry, denizens, I’m sure I will return to my original idea soon enough).

There are so many happy memories wrapped up in this post, memories both of this amazing performance and of the trip in general. How could there not be? I had already fallen truly, madly, deeply in love with London during a previous trip there; I was now courting a serious crush on Dublin; and to wrap it all up, I was sitting in a theatre (it’s mandatory to spell it this way in deference to the English, you know), getting ready to see Menzel reprise her role as Elphaba—one of those great “Broadway experiences I’ll never have” that I had already filed sadly at the top of my list near “Sarah Brightman and Michael Crawford as Christine Daaé and the Phantom” and “Patti LuPone as Eva Perón.”

Yes. Yes, denizens. I’m a musical geek, too. Hell, the first “Poster Pick” entry that I did of a poster from my own collection was of the poster to Wicked! It is what it is. I hope you don’t love me any less.

Anyway, here then is my original 10.03.06 post, originally entitled “Flying Monkeys Edition.” First, though? This is a desktop wallpaper collage that I designed for the first iteration of the lair (back when it was much more than a blog…but also much less fun). This is a very early example of my burgeoning PhotoShop skillz, and I remember being very excited about the final result. There are a few things that I would fix or do differently, but actually, it’s still not that bad, is it? Oh, and if you’re so inclined, you can “click to embiggen” the image below (tip of the paw to Wil Wheaton for the embiggening quote).

I am completely remiss. In all my ramblings about Dublin and London, I have missed speaking of the climactic ending of the journey: second night previews for Wicked. I had seen this musical on Broadway in March of last year…front row seats that we won at that evening’s ticket lottery. That was to die for—my first Broadway show and everything. Shoshana Bean had taken over the role of Elphaba at that point and was doing a marvelous job. It’s a phenomenal musical and does the story beautiful justice regardless of the many turns away from the book it takes along its own yellow brick road. Still, there was that small kernel of sadness within me that I didn’t get the chance to see Idina Menzel as Elphaba.

Flash-forward to the curtain rising at the Apollo Victoria on September 8, 2006. The Time Dragon Clock above the proscenium awoke, smoke curling from its nostrils, red eyes flashing at the expectancy rising from the audience. It was amazing and so exciting to me that here was this primarily British audience packed to capacity, joyfully embracing this thoroughly American musical and its thoroughly American star. It was only second night of previews, and there wasn’t an empty seat to be seen.

Glinda arrived by bubble, Australian and perky (it was an interesting choice that they chose not to hide their accents from the audience a la the London version of Chicago; just emphasized American Elphaba’s differences even more). We all quickly fell into the cadence of the music and the words, the beauty of the sets and costumes.

Then the spark of green as she finally made her entrance, charging to the front of the stage in true Elphaba style…and the musical literally almost came to a stop to allow the thunderous wave of applause and cheers buoy this tiny green girl with the white stripe of a smile against emerald skin. Had Idina Menzel worried about whether the West End would welcome her as she had been welcomed on Broadway, there certainly could be no further doubt. The applause, the cheers, the laughter, and in the end, the tears were not in short supply at all that evening.

And, dear gods, that voice. Were I to take my CD and hook it up to the largest speakers I could find and crank “Defying Gravity” as loudly as it could go, that would only reach a fraction of the volume and richness of hearing her live. There was not one brick of that building that was not touched by her voice. And the moment when she was suspended high above the stage by both platform and vocals, singing my favorite song from the soundtrack…that was the moment most worth the price of admission. It was the front seat fluttering giddiness of an inverted coaster, squared. Yes, it truly was that spectacular.

Idina Menzel is only slated to play Elphaba long enough to welcome the Brits into this new Oz. By January, there will be a new Elphaba, but I predict that Wicked is going to be defying gravity for quite some time to come at the Apollo Victoria (ironically, the inside of this theatre is emerald green, with lots of Ozian type glasswork…very flattering).

And there you have it, snoggees. I have rectified my error, both in not seeing Ms. Menzel when she was actually on my side of the pond, and in not sharing with you all the experience. Hope you enjoyed this little glimpse into the special place in my heart reserved for musicals.

Photo Fun Friday: The Troi Legacy

Yes, I’ve taken another pass on Flashback Friday. I wasn’t intending on doing another PhotoShop Trickery so soon here at the lair. Then, this idea hit me on Tuesday evening. I blame it on all the Tilex fumes I was inhaling at the time:

While not as original or intricate as my CYBORG poster from last week, this still delights me in the most wonderfully nerdy ways. Now, I know that it’s all a bit anachronistic, with the DS9-era runabout and the delta shield from the recent movie being used alongside Deanna Troi. But, hey, if JJ Abrams cares so little for continuity or things that make sense in the Trek universe, why should I? (Yeah, if you haven’t gotten this yet, I really hated that new Trek movie).

Anyway. Random Geek RageTM moment aside, I hope you all enjoy this as much as I enjoyed designing it. I especially enjoyed being able to tie it all back to that famous litany that always applied to the indomitable Lwaxana Troi. Regardless of the fact that Deanna didn’t think very highly of her obviously royal Betazoid lineage, even once dismissing the Sacred Chalice of Rixx as nothing more than “an old clay pot with mold growing inside it,” this was still her legacy. One day, she would become the Daughter of the Fifth House.

Sounds very ninja, doesn’t it? Maybe this could be all about Deanna finally learning the truth of what this title really means, how her family is one of the defenders of Betazed’s greatest treasures and darkest secrets. And now it is time for her to step into the place of her now gone mother (sorry, Lwaxana) and prove to her people that she has the skills and abilities it will take to defend and uphold the duties of the Fifth House (and finally clean the mold out of that sacred chalice).

Okay, that’s just a tasty bit of awesome right there, isn’t it? I’m envisioning this with lots of martial arts fighting, lots of high-speed chases, and lots of smexy CGI. And Mr. Homm.

Who wants in?

Photo Fun Friday: CYBORG

Taking another pass on the regularly scheduled Flashback Friday, denizens. I was going to write about today’s final shuttle launch, but it gave me a horrible case of the sads just thinking about it.

So I decided to do something that would make me happy.

This, my friends, made me immensely happy:

I’ve had this idea in my head for a while now, mainly because I was always so amused by the fact that Ron Moore gave his Cylons number designations…with the exception of “Seven.” Did any of you ever notice that? The “Significant Seven” actually were One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, and Eight. So what happened to Seven?

According to BSG, One wiped out all the Sevens in a fit of jealousy. I, however, like to think that this was Ron Moore giving a tip of his hat to the fact that there is only one Seven. She just happens to be in another time and another quadrant of space.

What would happen, though, if Cylon met Borg? If Six met Seven? Does anyone else out there think this would be EPIC?

Think about it. A Cylon resurrection ship somehow gets transported through some kind of space/time rift (who knows, maybe Wesley’s playing around with those warp bubbles again), and it ends up in the Delta Quadrant, right as Voyager is being attacked by the Borg Queen. Imagine what would happen if the Borg Queen got her slithery hands on those pretty, shiny Cylon Centurions. All that compliant metal, just waiting to be controlled. Plus, all the different models of Human Cylons, ready to be assimilated, ready to die for their new Queen only to be resurrected each and every time.

But there’s hope! Never underestimate the power of that Tertiary Adjunct, Seven of Nine, especially when she combines forces with Caprica Six! Two 6-foot-tall, weapon wielding blondes with cybernetic enhancements, come to kick ass and take names…er, numbers? I would so pay to see this. And you know you would, too.

I even came up with the following, which I tried to work into the poster but decided to leave off:

Two ships in search of home.
One enemy in search of the perfect drone.
Now, two species once reviled by humanity may be humanity’s last hope.

Again I say…EPIC.

Someone get me Ron Moore and Rick Berman. It’s time to fire JJ Abrams and get Trek back on track, cyber style!

Resistance Is Twit-tile

Techie Trekkie Tweeters know one inevitable truth regarding Jeri Ryan’s own tweetaholic condition: Resistance is futile.

It’s true! Our favorite former freelance Borg has a bit of an addiction when it comes to Twitter. She’s even admitted to being late to interviews because she was swept up in tweetapalooza moments.

I know it’s silly, but I find this just makes Ms. Ryan even more endearing. How do you not love the strange serendipity of the actress who once played a disconnected Borg now being unable to disconnect herself from this crazy 140-character Collective? Life does, indeed, imitate art sometimes.

Therefore, I give you the latest PhotoShop Trickery, inspired by Jeri Ryan and her fantabulous Twitter shenanigans:

7 of 9's recurring nightmare

Photo Fun Friday: CSI: Underworld

Foregoing Flashback Friday today, denizens. Not in a nostalgic mood at the moment. Besides, I got the seed of a kooky idea the other day that just wouldn’t go away…so I decided to make it happen in the only way I know how—PhotoShop it!

So, did you know that Jorja Fox once played a vampire in a really cheesy-awesome made-for-television movie called House of Frankenstein 1997? It was something done by NBC (who is owned by Universal, house of all the big horror movie monsters back in the day) and includes vampires, werewolves, and Frankenstein’s monster. It’s not available on DVD or video…but I’m sure that if you know where to look, you might be able to find it somewhere to watch. Also, since SyFy is owned by Universal, this movie usually tends to appear around Halloween.

Anyway, I learned more about this movie through Jorja Fox: Online (which is quite an impressive fan-run site) and even found some screen caps of Fox’s scene-fanging moments as Felicity the Campy Vampire. And that’s when the idea started to grow. It’s what happens when the chocolate and peanut butter of all the crazy genre ideas in my brain start to swirl together. So CSI started to combine with vampire flicks…one thing led to another…and then it happened…

Sara Sidle as a crime scene investigating vampire? I don’t know about you, but I’d tune in. Every show. Maybe I should pitch this as a new spin-off. Something to inject a little fresh blood (heh) into the CSI franchise. Besides, we need something to take back the night for respectable (read: non-sparkly) vampires.

We now return you to our regularly scheduled geekery. Flashback Friday will return…but Photo Fun Friday might sneak back in every now and again. Hope you all don’t mind.