Author: LobaBlanca

Febrewary: Milk Stout Nitro

~ LobaBlanca

06-febrewary-msn

Brewer: Left Hand Brewing Company
Location: Longmont, Colorado
Type: Sweet Stout
ABV: 6%

As I mentioned back in Darktober while reviewing a beer from a different Colorado-based craft brewery, I love Left Hand Brewing Company, simply because they introduced me to their beautiful milk stout. Well, that and the fact that I’m left-handed. But that’s neither here nor there.

It was no surprise, then, that when I first read about their success in bottling a nitrogen-charged beer, and that said beer was my favorite of their brews that I have tried? Well, I had to have some.

If you’re curious, charging a beer with a nitrogen/carbon dioxide mix rather than just carbon dioxide gives the brew an intense, silky mouth feel. It’s also supposed to accentuate sweeter flavors within the beer (it’s not surprising, then, that Left Hand would choose their milk stout for this experiment). It used to be that you could only get “on nitro” in bars that had the right equipment to pull a proper draft. That or those silly Guinness bottles and cans with the little ping-pong balls and rockets inside. Those never tasted convincing…or good, by the by.

For this beer, Left Hand uses no foreign objects…just a two-word instruction: Pour Hard.

And that’s precisely what I did: Popped the top and upended the bottle into my glass in a perfectly vertical position. The nitrogen charge holds in place rather than fizzing out of the glass, instead pulling downward in that beautiful “cascade effect” made most famous by Guinness. I wish I could have gotten a photo of that, but it happens quite quickly before slowing and reversing upward into a gorgeous frothy frosting of foam atop the beer.

Visual feast aside, sweetness assails my sense of smell as this beer burbles and frolics in its glass. I’ve read that Left Hand recommends chilling this beer before serving. I don’t, simply because I have learned that darker beers offer up so much more complexity when warmer. Therefore, right from the start, I detect scents of chocolate, coffee, cream…something soft and sweet like a mocha latte made from a perfectly dark-roasted blend.

Again, thank the nitrogen for the full-bodied mouth feel and the creamy slip of every sip of this beer along my tongue. Milk Stout Nitro is the epitome of a dessert beer. Thick, luscious, delectable…with one slight misstep. There’s a strange metallic aftertaste. I’d describe it as comparable to licking a nearly dead AA battery after each swallow (but not a 9-volt!). I’ve had many a regular milk stout from this brewer, so I know that this isn’t normal for this beer. It’s something that settles into the other flavors with a little time, but I’m wondering if this is the one down side of Left Hand’s attempt at nitro-charged bottling.

Honestly, though, if this is the only hiccup, I’m okay with it. The resultant beer drinking experience you get from a bottle of Milk Stout Nitro is nothing short of wondrous. Obviously, others have agreed in large enough numbers that Left Hand has introduced nitrogen-charged versions of their Sawtooth All-American Ale and their Wake Up Dead Stout. I can assure you, I am already on the lookout for these two new experiences.

Febrewary: Winter Warmer Ale

~ LobaBlanca

03-febrewary-lwwa

Brewer: Lancaster Brewing Company
Location: Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Type: Old Ale
ABV: 8.9%

Oh, denizens, don’t forget your booties, because it’s a cold one out there today!

It’s cold out there every day. Talk about the season of our discontent. It’s the perfect weather for staying indoors, wrapping up in blankets and leopard-print slippers, and sipping a nice winter ale. And what more perfectly named beer than Lancaster’s Winter Warmer Ale?

Truth is, I fell instantly in love with this beer the first time I saw the bottle for two reasons. First, it’s from Lancaster Brewing, which makes some incredibly tasty beers and offers one of the most impressive beer flights I have ever had. Seriously, if you love well-crafted beers and ever find yourself near their brewpub, you have got to go and have a flight. They bring you ample pours of every beer they have on tap. This is typically between 12 and 14 beers. It’s pricier than most flights, but it is worth every single penny.

Second reason? Well, that one should be more than obvious from the photo of the bottle. Yes, that would be a wolf on the label. More importantly, proceeds from this particular beer go to support the work of The Wolf Sanctuary of Pennsylvania. Yes, I’ve been there, ironically on the same day that we went to Lancaster Brewing and I had their awesome beer flight.

I wish I could say that the beer inside the bottle was as awesome as the outside label or the generous deal that Lancaster has with the wolf sanctuary. Pour this dark beauty into a glass and see rivulets of ruby sketch through the mahogany darkness. Very low carbonation but an incredibly intense bouquet of dried figs and currants smacks you right in your olfactory zone.

Take a sip (and I do mean a sip) and you find yourself plunging head-first into a molasses-sweet morass that still succeeds in zinging your tastebuds with hoppy astringency. It’s actually quite a disconcerting experience to drink this beer, as the bitterness bites you up front while the sweetness clings to the back of your palate, building up with every swallow.

It was a struggle to get through even half of this beer. I thought letting it warm a little (yes, I did have this one in the beer fridge rather than in the storage room with most of my other dark beer; I don’t really know why) might help; instead, it merely intensified the sweetness.

I so desperately want to like this beer. I guess I will just have to make donations directly to the wolf sanctuary rather than support them through this brew. That said, I still think that Lancaster is an amazing brewer and I will continue to enjoy several of their other beers. I also hope to make it back to their brewpub again soon, especially if I ever hear that they’ve got their chocolate strawberry stout back on tap. Anyone up for a road trip? 🙂

BookBin2014: The Casual Vacancy

~ LobaBlanca

casualvacancy

I suppose that notoriety for a particular “thing” does have a bit of a double edge to it. Yes, you have gained fame (and often great financial stability from said fame), but you also have found yourself pigeon-holed by expectations that you forever continue to be/do said famous “thing.”

Such is the case with J.K. Rowling. After spending more than a decade spinning the tales of Harry Potter and his band of friends and foes at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, she was both quite financially set (richer than the bloody Queen!) and quite pigeon-holed. What do you mean, you don’t want to write about Harry’s adventures anymore? What? You want to…write for adults now?

(Okay, some can very validly argue that she was writing for adults also with the Harry Potter books.)

So, after years of being She Who Must Write Harry Potter Fiction, Rowling decided to hang up her invisibility cloak and set to writing different stories about different people in a completely different style. A style meant for grups.

I have to admit, denizens, that I found this highly disorienting. I sort of expected this response, which is why it took me this long to take a stab finally at Rowling’s novel The Casual Vacancy.

From an objective perspective, Rowling’s first foray into writing for adults? Not bad. Quite decent, actually. She’s rather successfully brought her acumen for planning and outlining intricate plot points in clear language to this novel about the idyllic parish of Pagford and many of its residents. She weaves a detailed tale of the many surface and surprising ways that the sudden death of Parish Councillor Barry Fairbrother impacts the town. She assembles an impressive array of characters and how they connect, impact, influence, irritate, offend, betray, belittle, disappoint, inspire…basically, how they interact with each other in realistic, albeit overly negative ways (Rowling’s commentary on our real-life propensities to too often be utter gits to one another?).

Objectively, this is a fascinating character study from a skilled author, even if it is a bit like a slightly more high-brow, slightly more believable literary equivalent of a soap opera. Rowling’s take on The EastEnders?

Subjectively, I have to confess that I found myself often thinking that the writing was far too blue, far too graphic at times

Flashback Friday: The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert

~ LobaBlanca

You know me, denizens. I lurves me some drag queens. I know, some prefer the term “female impersonator.” Some prefer “gender illusionist.” I take all this into account and I respect it. However, in this particular instance, it’s definitely drag queens. Two, to be precise: Mitzi Del Bra and Felicia Jollygoodfellow, along with their transsexual friend Bernadette Bassenger. Seems they have a gig to perform their drag show in a remote part of Australia, far from their Sydney home base. The only reason that Mitzi would even consider traveling so far and to such a questionable location is because the hotel manager is…special to her. So they pack up their kits (which include lots of makeup, lots of shoes, lots of wigs, and lots of the most elaborate outfits imaginable) into a giant bus they christen…what? Priscilla!

And thus begins The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

pqotd

This is a relatively bare-bones explanation of this movie’s plot. It’s kind of hard to give more, because if you haven’t seen it, the descriptions aren’t really going to make much sense…and if you have seen it, you’re going to understand completely what I mean with that last statement. I can tell you all the details in the world, but it’s not going to be even remotely close to actually experiencing this movie. Which I highly recommend you do, at least once. Then you too can immediately laugh along whenever you hear someone mention this movie and ping pong or blow-up doll kites or ABBA poo. Or Ralph.

Wait. ABBA. Song break!

//www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/Gv_6Gz-6Gig

See what I mean?

Me? I’ve seen this movie all the way through more times than I can tally (although I know it’s well into the double digits), and way more than that in bits and bobs whenever I catch it on television. Beyond being hilarious and riotous and strange and delightful, it amuses me to no end that the three leads each have found varying levels of fame playing characters utterly opposite from these lovely ladies: Mitzi later became Agent Smith, the ultimate foil to Keanu “The One” Reeves in The Matrix; Felicity would later forget her drag days along with every thing else as Leonard in Memento; and Bernadette once brought Christopher Reeve’s Superman to his knees as General Zod (back when Superman wasn’t mopey and pewey).

It blows my mind a bit that this movie came out 20 years ago this year. All three actors have gone on to do myriad performances beyond these characters, and still these are the roles I think of first whenever I see them. These are the roles I love them for the most.

I know there’s a musical based on this movie. I haven’t heard any of the music. I kind of don’t want to. The movie amuses me so much in its own right, I don’t really need to see another take on it. Besides, it has to be Australian. In Australia. With Australian actors (and Bernadette Zod). And not terrible fake Australian accents. Call me a purist, but I need my Oz fix, dammit.

As a special treat, I’ve come up with the following bit of PhotoShop fun. I call it Three Spocks in Frocks on a Rock. If you don’t get the pun, you now have another reason why you need to watch this movie. You’re welcome.

Click to embiggen
Click for more…

BookBin2014: Dark Tide

~ LobaBlanca

darktide

First, a caveat: This book has two different titles, depending on which side of the pond you find it. In Elizabeth Haynes’s home country of England, the book is known as Revenge of the Tide. Here in the colonies, however, the book is called Dark Tide. Haynes does make note of the fact that the U.S. version of her story went through additional revisions that provided a bit more back story for the main character. Perhaps they changed the title to allow readers the chance to more easily identify the two different versions. I’ll go with that answer for now.

Anyway, I decided that I wanted to continue on the mystery thriller streak that I started with Gone Girl. This book sounded promising from its dust jacket blurb, which describes how protagonist Genevieve Shipley has left behind all the stresses of London to spend a year remodeling a houseboat she purchased in Kent (heh, Shipley…houseboat…clever girl, that Haynes). Part of the stress, however, finds her in her new home when she discovers the body of a former friend/colleague floating outside her bedroom window one night.

Different level of stress from what we’re used to, eh?

From the point of discovery, we begin to learn more of Genevieve’s London life: Of her horrible day job that she wants to leave more than anything, and of the night job she takes to reach her financial goals a bit more quickly. Seems she’s got quite a talent for pole-dancing in her exercise class, so her instructor (a former stripper, of course) sets her up to become the newest dancer at the Barclay, a classy gentleman’s club where the strippers might wear very little, but they never wear clear heels.

Chris Rock hollaback.

Truthfully, this wasn’t a bad novel. Haynes is an able writer and, as a police analyst, she infuses a certain level of professional believability into her writing that grounds it, gives it a bit of much-appreciated heft. I’m still uncertain as to whether I’m ever going to be a true fan of these types of books, but I obviously enjoyed this one enough to finish it (although I didn’t find it to be quite the page turner that I found Gone Girl to be).

Plus, Genevieve is a likeable enough character. Actually, many of Haynes’s characters were likeable (which was a welcome change from the last book). I read a couple of reviews that dubbed Genevieve a “good girl gone bad.” I don’t necessarily think that’s a fair assessment. If anything, I think that Genevieve remains relatively inline with her true self (which isn’t “good” or “bad”…I’d say she’s a decent soul). She’s a bit naive when it comes to certain things, true, but she’s also more than aware of other things, knows how to take care of herself (for the most part) and knows that sometimes you have to take different routes to get to where you want to go. I wouldn’t say she’d “gone bad” at all; she just made allowances that she didn’t properly think through so that she could get what she wanted. This story is just an exaggerated example of how having tunnel-vision focus on a goal can sometimes lead to very bad things.

Final Verdict: Dark Tide is a solid enough mystery that had a satisfying series of revelations and wrap-ups. I don’t foresee purchasing it, but I wouldn’t be averse to reading other novels from Haynes.

BookBin2014: Gone Girl

~ LobaBlanca

gonegirl

New year, time to start the new BookBin litany. Of course, I’m still promising to get through all the books from my own collection that I need to read…and now that I have them all properly arranged in one place thanks to relocating to a new domicile that has, of all wondrous things, denizens, my very own reading den, I see how many books I own that I have never read. It’s alarming.

So what did I do? I went to the library and checked out a stack of books…including the book that I saw most frequently at the top of people’s book stacks last year: Gillian Flynn’s suspense thriller Gone Girl.

I was a bit worried about getting this book, which was why I avoided picking it up last year whenever I saw a copy available in the New Releases section. I’m infamous for balking at those things most people bury under mounds of hyperbolic praise. There is nothing more difficult sometimes than living up to other people’s hype. Amplify that hype through the ever-present, always wired online echo chamber and good luck trying to hear an honest opinion above the roar.

However, I recently read a book-to-movie list for 2014, and Gone Girl was there, directed by David Fincher, one of my favorite modern filmmakers. I decided this was the push that I needed to finally read this novel.

Here’s a quick snippet of the “official” description:

On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri, it is Nick and Amy’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and reservations are being made when Nick Dunne’s clever and beautiful wife disappears from their rented McMansion on the Mississippi River. Husband-of-the-Year Nick Dunne isn’t doing himself any favors with cringe-worthy daydreams about the slope and shape of his wife’s head, but hearing from Amy through flashbacks in her diary reveal the perky perfectionist could have put anyone dangerously on edge.

Under mounting pressure from the police and the media – as well as Amy’s fiercely doting parents – the town golden boy parades an endless series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter – but is he really a killer? As the cops close in, every couple in town is soon wondering how well they know the one that they love. With his twin sister Margo at his side, Nick stands by his innocence. Trouble is, if Nick didn’t do it, where is that beautiful wife? And what was left in that silvery gift box hidden in the back of her bedroom closet?

That’s all I’m going to give in regard to plot. I’d hate to give away anything here, as this is a suspense novel. Part of the fun of these stories, I’m told, is figuring out the mystery for yourself. I found that some of the twists in this novel become quite obvious, especially as you get a better feel for the truth hidden among the flotsam of falsities that saturate this story. Some twists are less obvious, but if you’re paying close enough attention, especially to those “innocuous” throw-away lines, you’ll be okay.

Admittedly, I found that I couldn’t put down this novel. This became a problem in the evenings, since I usually read as a means of mellowing out and shifting into “sleep” mode. This book did not make me want to sleep. It made me want to keep reading. I finally capitulated to this need and spent the better part of this past weekend devouring the remainder of this novel.

My general opinion of Gone Girl is that Flynn is a masterful writer who apparently has chosen to specialize in showcasing some of the worst that humanity has to offer. I disliked practically every character. I think, though, that’s the point. Apparently, Flynn wants us to believe that some people live their awful lives, surrounded by equally awful people…or people far more awful than they could ever aspire to become. For Flynn, awful attracts awful. Twisted forms more twisted. Repulsive is the new black.

Then there is the ending. Many people hate the ending. Many view it as a cop-out. Many view it as ruinous. I can understand these reactions. I didn’t experience any of these responses, but I think that’s because I was not invested in any of these characters. I realized pretty early on that I didn’t care what happened to any of them. I was more fascinated by Flynn’s writing and her incredibly warped sensibilities…watching how she tied the knots and then watching how she would untangle them all in the end. I might have experienced some sympathy for a couple of the characters, but that didn’t last long. If anything, they are interesting to observe before leaving them behind and thanking your lucky stars that you don’t know anyone who even remotely resembles any of these people.

If you do know people like the ones in a Flynn novel, I’m supremely sorry.

I didn’t think the ending was all that out-of-character. I also didn’t have any other preferred ending in mind. I know many people were probably looking for an ending in which certain characters received retribution. No one likes to think that bad people can get away with doing bad things. Sadly, though, it happens all the time in real life…and we apparently want all our escapism to be just the same as the reality we’re seeking to escape. So…retribution denied.

As for the movie, I’m actually pretty on-board with most of the casting. I think Rosamund Pike will make a great Amy Elliott Dunne. I actually think Ben Affleck will make a good Nick Dunne. I do wish they were closer in age, but that’s an aesthetic complaint only at this point. Strangely enough, I was actually picturing Neil Patrick Harris as Desi Collings in my mind as I read the novel, so I’m obviously okay with his casting. I disagree with Tyler Perry as Tanner Bolt, but that’s because I disagree with Tyler Perry. Kim Dickens was a surprise to me as Detective Rhonda Boney, but that’s another aesthetic gripe (the novel’s Boney does not sound like she would look at all like Dickens). I really hope that Emily Ratajkowski can do more than make “duck face,” because she’s going to be really irritating if she can’t.

Final Verdict: I don’t think I want to add this novel to my own collection. It has made me want to seek out at least one more example of Flynn’s writing style, but probably not for a while. I don’t know if I want to submerge myself so soon into the warped psyches of the inhabitants of Flynn’s world. However, I will be keeping an eye on movie news. I might even go see this in the theater. Probably not…but you never know!

TL;DR

~ LobaBlanca

I give this my vote for one of the ugliest acronyms in the indecipherable sea of txtspk brevity: “Too Long; Didn’t Read.”

The first time I ever saw it was in regard to an article that was, admittedly, longer than one typically has time to absorb during work-day downtime. However, recently I’ve been seeing it with more and more frequency, sometimes in reference to pieces that dare to be more than the length of a tweet. And that greatly bothers me.

I’m old-school in a lot of ways when it comes to words. I see beauty in words the way many see beauty in a Van Gogh or a sunset. Words unlock my imagination in ways that no amount of CGI manipulation ever will. Want to not hear a sound from me for an entire day? Place a stack of books on one side of me and a fresh supply of coffee on the other. You’ll forget I’m even there. The best part? I’ll forget I’m there, too, because I’ll be in myriad other locations and times…wherever those beautiful words lead me.

Sometimes, I feel as though I am a dying breed…that I’m the awkward, bloated blog post in the room full of fit tweets, all silently judging me for not shedding my verbal lumpiness and joining them in their snappy bon mot runs every day because I’m too busy gorging myself on wordiness.

Other times, however, I feel as though I am succumbing to the wordless void. It’s so easy. Open up your social media account. I’ll bet one of the first things to pop up in your feed is going to be a photo or a video posted by one of your friends

BookBin2013: Batman R.I.P.

~ LobaBlanca

batmanrip

Yes, that’s right…one more BookBin review for the late, great 2013. I didn’t completely finish this one last year, but I finished the bulk of it…so it counts, dammit.

To be honest, I felt mostly lost the entire time that I was reading Batman R.I.P., written by Grant Morrison and illustrated by Tony S. Daniel (with cover art by the impeccable Alex Ross…who likes Batman’s eyes to be brown while the book artist makes them blue). I don’t really follow Batman in the comics. I know enough about him through comic book osmosis, the 1960s show, and the Tim Burton movies (well, at least the first one was awesome). The only thing the Christopher Nolan movies taught me was that I could really hate Batman under the right circumstances.

Nolan’s movies also taught me that I really don’t like The Joker being played as totally psychopathic and cruel. He needs to have some kind of softening humor to him. Some kind of Cesar Romero or Jack Nicholson joie de vivre. Without that whimsy, he’s just…like any other psychotic killer. Even Alan Moore’s Joker was more interesting than the way the character comes across now. And having him split his tongue with a straight razor (SPOILERZ) so that it looked like a serpent’s tongue? That was around the point when I kind of shut down on that character. I can’t help it. I grew up with Romero’s kooky, loveable Joker and “This town needs an enema!” Nicholson Joker. Besides, why does everything have to be so sick and twisted and dark anymore? Tongue-splitting Joker. Neck-breaking Superman. Spoilerz. What happened to having fun with these stories?

I get that Batman’s had a rough life. As rough as a life can be for a multimillionaire who never has to work an honest day in his entire life. I guess we should be thankful that he wants to do good and fight evil rather than jet off to Bora Bora every weekend with his latest fling. Still, lighten up, Brucie. Dark Knight is Dark. And mopey. Then again, this is called “Batman R.I.P.” Moping is allowed, I suppose, when everyone is always trying to kill you.

All in all, it was an entertaining read with some really fine artwork, even if: A) I felt like I was missing key information while reading parts of it; and B) It does go a bit off the rails here and there (although maybe those moments would have made more sense if I’d had all the pieces to the puzzle). Also, no one is ever going to believe that any of these characters is ever going to really die. People who don’t really die: Star Trek characters and comic book heroes. Whether they come back as half-Romulan hybrids or they’re rebooted back into existence, they’re always going to be around. Not even having a bridge dropped on him could stop Captain Kirk, in the books at least. SpoilerZ. So at no point did I ever believe that Batman was really going to die. Also, I have the pleasure of being in the now and knowing that Batman does, indeed, still live.

I also don’t really get the back story for all the different Robins. Yeah, I know that one of them is now Nightwing. And I think one of them is dead (okay, so some characters do die…but only the replaceable ones). Not that I really care all that much. Still…it feels like there’s something questionable going on in Gotham that they keep remanding all these boys over to Bruce Wayne’s care but not investigating when they “go missing.” Maybe that’s just me. I had to laugh at the appearance of original Batwoman, in her yellow onesie and her Bat lust for Bruce Wayne. Oh, Katy Kane. You so cray.

And now excuse me while I wash my brain out with peroxide for actually using the word “cray.”

Final Verdict: Even though I found the novel enjoyable enough to finish it, I guess it’s safe to say that I’m not much of a Batman comic fan. I still love the original series and I still love the Tim Burton movie. I also like the concept of the character, for the most part. However, I think I find others from the Bat Family more interesting than the Dark Knight. Still, I’ve got a “classic” Batman graphic novel in my collection that I need to finally read. I’ll let you know how that goes…

BookBin2013: The Underwater Welder

~ LobaBlanca

underwaterwelder

I nearly put Jeff Lemire’s graphic novel The Underwater Welder back before even giving the story a proper go. Why? Because the Introduction’s author likened the story to “the most spectacular episode of The Twilight Zone that was never produced.” That’s not what set me off; I actually love The Twilight Zone. What set me off was the author himself: Damon Lindelof. Otherwise known as “The Butcher of GallitepStar Trek Movie Scripts.”

My honest initial reaction was, if Lindelof knows as much about The Twilight Zone as he does about Trek, then no thank you. However, I resisted the temptation to judge the book based solely on the questionable choice of Lindelof as the one responsible for introducing this novel. And I’m very glad that I did.

Lemire’s story of Jack Joseph, he of the titular profession, is equal parts eerie, surreal, mysterious, and moving. Jack is facing the life change of a newborn son

Merry X-mas!

~ LobaBlanca

No, denizens, I’m not contributing to the “war on Christmas.” You know me, though…always looking for a loophole. And, in this case, our two lovely well-wishers would say nothing less than Merry X-mas. Think about it…what if, at the end of the series, Mulder and Scully disappeared to the North Pole and took up residence as that mythical toymaking duo, the Clauses? We’d all want to believe then, eh? Plus, they’d still be having crazy adventures with strange UFOs…just now, Mulder would be at the helm!

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As a special treat, click the small and get the full-sized version. Use as you wish. Share as you wish. I hope it brings you joy. And, whatever your pleasure, denizens, I hope your day is marvelous. Just like you.