Presidential Age-Off: Bartlet v. Roslin

Two of my all-time favorite television shows are Aaron Sorkin’s The West Wing and Ron Moore’s reboot of Battlestar Galactica. Interestingly enough, at the heart of both shows is a strong vein of politics played both fairly and deceptively (not that big a surprise from the former show, but a lovely layer of the latter that made it such a pleasure to watch).

Both shows also featured presidents, one of the United States and one of what’s left of the 12 colonies of Caprica. Martin Sheen played U.S. President Jed Bartlet, a bright beacon of hope during the dismal darkness of the real Bush II presidency. Mary McDonnell portrayed Laura Roslin, former Secretary of Education who found herself thrust into the presidency when all in line before her were killed in the Cylon attack on Caprica that started the BSG journey.

Beyond the obvious similarities, both of these presidents held health secrets from their constituents. Bartlet had relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis. By the end of the show, the disease was causing a rapid and noticeable decay of his body.

In the very first episode of BSG, Roslin learns that she has terminal cancer. By the end of BSG…well…like I said, she had terminal cancer. I’m sure you can figure this one out on your own.

Now even under the healthiest situations, a president always leaves his station looking much more bedraggled and aged than he did coming into it. Look at recent evidence. Du(m)bya left looking much older than the actual numbers of his age (or his IQ). And the only way Clinton was still feeling young at the end of his presidency was when he was groping up interns in the Oval Office. Several have even pointed out that Obama is already starting to show more gray than he did prior to January 20, 2009.

Add the strain of an incurable disease and you’re bound to look even more wrung out, right? Certainly was the case with President Bartlet.

bartlet-bae

In the beginning, he was a middle-aged statesman, with still dark hair and minimal lines to his face. He was commanding and centered and the White House was bright with hope in his presence. By the end, however, he’d gone gray with white at his temples, the lines had deepened, his stance slouched and aided by a cane, and the brightness of his new administration slowly dimming to a close (aren’t these photographers just too clever?).

Yes, I’m sure that some of this was makeup decisions done to enhance the strain of both being president and fighting a once relapsed illness that is now making up for wasted time.

BUT…then there is Laura Roslin.

roslin-bae

To borrow that ridiculous BSG epithet: What the frack?!

Seriously, I cannot even begin to express the joy I felt inside when I saw Mary McDonnell that first time as Laura Roslin. It had been a while since I had last seen her, and then there she was, wrinkles and crow’s feet, and looking absolutely beautiful. Even better, she looked REAL. And I was filled with so much hope and happiness that here was an actress who was embracing her age and all the lines that came with it, and doing it with incomparable grace.

This second photo is how she appeared in the final season. You could bounce a quarter off her face, it’s so tight. Dull, expressionless forehead. No more lines around her eyes or her mouth. What you don’t see in this photo, but what was depressingly obvious in the show, is the fact that this “youthful” appearance came with a price. One side of her mouth droops now as though she’s had a stroke. Her eyes also don’t always blink synchronously anymore.

This was supposed to be a woman who was leading the remnants of a destroyed world through the unknown dangers of space while fighting a seemingly unstoppable Cylon enemy and being slowly consumed by incurable cancer. But this is how she looked at the end. Yes, they did her up on the show with pale makeup and a “cancer” wig (which is what she’s wearing in this second photo). But that face…

It was perfectly acceptable to show the progression of age and illness with Bartlet, but Roslin not only had to lead the colonists to earth, but she had to do it while apparently paying regular visits to Doc Cottle for galactic Botox injections. Maybe he was really just injecting her cancer treatments straight into her face and this was the end result.

jlange

Obviously, what I’m really doing at this point is screaming into the roar of the Hollywood machine that makes women feel less than publicly acceptable if they dare show even one shadow of an age line on their face. How else can we explain this recent photo of the now perpetually surprised Jessica Lange? Would you have even known this was Lange had I not identified her? I sure as hell didn’t recognize her without a caption.

And why is this acceptable? Because we’ve got fat tubs of douche like Rush Limbaugh clogging up the airwaves with “relevant” questions like is this country ready to have to watch Hillary Clinton age if she became president. Newsflash, Tubby: You’re not looking any younger (or thinner) yourself.

We all get old. It’s a fact of life. I’m in my early 30s, but I can see time leaving little trails across my face. Wrinkles around my eyes, parenthetical lines on each side of my mouth, a bagginess to my eyelids. Who gives a shit? The lines come from living, and I’d far rather have lines than not live. And guess what? You can tighten your face to the point of splitting in two and it’s not going to fool the Reaper.

For two seasons, Mary McDonnell made me so very happy when I would see her very real and very beautiful lines. I can’t say that I blame her or fault her for her decision to join the plastic posse. I can’t imagine the pressure she and her female acting peers must feel to constantly look 25. But just once, I’d like for an actress to just flip the double bird and embrace her age and all that it brings with it

Flood Gates

Did you know that Gates McFadden once studied mime? Or that Brent Spiner is her son’s godfather?

crusher-mime datagodfather

Did you know that Gates isn’t really her name? Well, it kind of is. Gates is her middle name. It was her mother’s maiden name. Her full name is Cheryl Gates McFadden. She was born in Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, on March 2, 1949. I always used to wonder if she and Majel Barrett ever had any chats about growing up in the Buckeye State (Ms. Barrett was born in Columbus, which I think is about 2 hours away from Cuyahoga Falls). For a while, though, she used to tell people that her birthday was August 28 because she was a little worried about telling people her real birthday. I find that strange but in an endearing way since it was only the month and day she changed

Thundercats High

Principal Lion-o would like to see you in his office
Principal Lion-o would like to see you in his office

There’s a public high school in the county in which I live that makes me smile whenever I pass it. My smile is for the geekiest of reasons. It’s because the school’s logo looks so eerily similar to the Thundercats logo that all I can think when I see the school is “Thundercats, ho!”

I wonder if any of the kids currently attending this school realize the similarity. Highly unlikely that it would be mainstream knowledge, considering the fact that even the oldest students at the school wouldn’t have been born until the last year of the original 1985-90 run of the Thundercats cartoon. Damned unappreciative young people.

I bet the school geeks realize it though. SNARF!

Kiss My Kirk

kissmykirk

Love the glam-rock showmanship of KISS? Can’t get enough of the real James Tiberius Kirk? Then you need KISS My Kirk, the smash collection that’s sweeping the Alpha Quadrant! Packed to the hilt with hits like:

  • All-American Kirk
  • She’s So Orion
  • Tribbles of the Night
  • (City on the Edge of) Forever
  • God Gave Kirk, Spock and Bones to You
  • Fits Like a Girdle
  • Photon Torpedo Girl
  • Warp Machine

…and much, much more! Transfer 20 Federation credits to LobaBlanca.com and download your copy of KISS My Kirk today!

First 100 to download this collection will receive a free Tribble*.

*LobaBlanca.com is not responsible if the Tribble you receive is already pregnant. LobaBlanca.com warns you that you need to have at least 40 acres of land available to house the inevitable Tribble brood that you will inherit should you be one of the lucky recipients of a free Tribble. LobaBlanca.com also recommends that you learn how to grow quadrotriticale to feed your Tribbles. A lot of quadrotriticale.

(See what happens when I have some spare time and access to PhotoShop?)

Feed Fail Fixed

It was brought to my attention a few days ago that the RSS Feed link I added to the lair didn’t work properly. Ever since, I’ve been trying to understand why it wasn’t working and what I had to do to fix it. Truth be told, I’m still out of my element in this new WordPress world. Database work makes me sweat, and not in a good way.

I do believe, however, that I figured out the problem. So to anyone else out there who has tried to subscribe to my RSS Feed and received naught for your efforts, I offer both my humble apology and an invitation to try again.

And a tip of the paw to cohnee for the heads-up!

Superpowers Not Included

Today, as the British would say, was utter pants.

No, that’s not it.

You know what ol’ Jack Burton always says about days like this.

No, that’s not it either.

Today stunk.

There! That’s what I was going for!

Yeah, so today really bit fuzzy puppies. I had a total crap day at work, to go along with a depressing string of crap days that really can’t be avoided and are, in fact, slated to come to an end very soon. But for the time being, utter crap. Then I came home to rejoin my regularly scheduled battle to their death with my seasonal foe, the house centipede. The little fuckers are already sprouting up in baby form. I greatly prefer the baby to the fully grown centipede, but they still freak the bejesus out of me. (Warning, if you are easily creeped out by bugs, you might not want to look at this picture; hell, even if you aren’t easily creeped out, you still might not want to look…I sure as hell wish I didn’t have to ever see another of these things again). I also discovered a few minutes ago that I bungled a file that I really didn’t need to bungle.

Crap.

But you know what made me feel better? Turning myself into a superhero. Yes, that’s right, thanks to the utter Canadian genius of my good friend, weathereye, I discovered the unmatchable joy of HeroMachine.com. Using Version 2.5, I made the following two images: One of me as my alter ego, LobaBlanca, with white wolf sidekick; and one of me in a DS9-era medical duty uniform, with white wolf sidekick (what? I’d totally have a wolf with me if I was a Starfleet officer).

Before you ask, I don’t know why I added a gun to my superhero version since I apparently can throw white-hot fireballs. i just thought it looked cool. And I wish I could have been holding a tricorder or a hypospray in the second picture, but I made do with what they had available. Anyway, these have sufficed to make my day a shred better than it’s been since I woke up. Hopefully, tomorrow will be even slightly better. And hopefully, by next week, everything will be right as rain.

lblb-dc

Delivering Happy

How, you might be wondering, can one deliver “happy”? Allow me to show you:

stvset

Yes, my friends, that would be all seven seasons of Star Trek: Voyager, still in their sealed DVD boxes. Delivered right to my door. That is how you deliver happy. And who made this wonderful delivery? The U.S. Postal Service! They paid for my education and now they bring me packages full of happy.

And why am I so surprised that they are all still wrapped? Because this is another one of my famous “used” purchases. I told you before that I’m cheap. So when I found this set for an AMAZING price, I went ahead and purchased it, fully expecting it to be a used set from someone’s collection, with some shelf wear on the packaging. Yet again, one of these sellers has blown me away by sending me a brand new product.

I think the USPS should consider changing their tagline from “Neither snow nor sleet nor blah-blah-whatever” to “USPS: Delivering Happy Straight to Your Door.”

Works for me.

Gaming Glory: Wolfenstein 3D

Get Psyched!
Get Psyched!

Deep in that dusty corner of my mental filing system, where childhood memories are shuffled off to be archived by those few working brain cells I haven’t saturated with Captain Morgan, there resides a special place for today’s selection: Wolfenstein 3D.

This was not only the first FPS that I ever played, but it was my first PC game as well (not counting my Texas Instrument days). I remember well the 5-1/4-inch floppy that contained the shareware version of the first episode (or was it freeware?). I never played more than this episode, so I never got to take on Hitler himself. But the first episode was satisfying enough, especially when playing in “Death Incarnate” mode. This was also probably the only FPS I ever played without the aid of any cheat codes. Guess that’s why it took me so long (damn the Internet for not being there for me when I needed it!).

I distinctly remember the terror of leading our hero,

Holy Creative Literacy Campaign, Batman!

Best. Resolution. Ever.
Best. Resolution. Ever.

So Dutch Ruppersberger, a U.S. Representative here in the great state of Muralynd (pronounce it as it’s spelled and you’ll sound like a local!) has proposed a resolution for “Free Comic Book Day.”

Actually, I think this was just his version of yelling “First” to all his other representatives, because Free Comic Book Day has been going on since 2002. But that’s okay. It’s not like Congress has a lot of other things on their plate right now.

Actually, this concept is pretty cool. My grandmother used to always encourage my voracious need to read by saying, “It doesn’t matter what you’re reading, just as long as you’re reading.” She might have had a different opinion had I been reading something like To Serve Mankind for the tasty recipes, but that wasn’t the case. Comic books can be quite the awesome gateway drug to other reading adventures. Or they can stand alone. There are some amazing comics…excuse me, graphic novels out there, that carry as much weight as “serious literature.”

So tomorrow is Free Comic Book Day 2009. Looks like there’s a nice selection from which to choose this year, including X-Men Origins: Wolverine, in honor of the movie hitting theaters today. I’ve never gone to this event before. Comics have never been high on my Collector radar. I’ve had the pleasure of reading other people’s collections, and that has satisfied me. But I might check this out.

I’m also going to put in a plug for one of my all-time favorite illustrators in the game today: Frank Cho. He’s going to be signing books from 1-4 at the Cards Comics & Collectibles here in Reistertown. He is an illustrating god and I have had the distinct pleasure of witnessing his talent from the very beginning (he did a deliciously bawdy strip for The Diamondback at UMCP). He’s also a cheeky little Monkey Boy TM and seems like he’d be really awesome in person. So check him out, check out Free Comic Book Day, and say hey to Comic Book Guy from me.

Tip of the paw to A2 for bringing this to the lair’s attention 🙂

Gaming Glory: Carmageddon 3

Your carma will catch up with you one day...
Your carma will catch up with you one day...

I used to love running over people with my car. In this game only, of course. I’d never do that in real life (at least not anymore; bodies leave unsightly dents on your hood). I mean, I really loved it. So it was inevitable that Carmageddon 3 would become one of my favorite racing games.

Strangely enough, though, I never really played the actual game. I just ran over people. In that regard, I would definitely consider the Carmageddon series to be a predecessor to the Grand Theft Auto series, in that you could enter the game world and just drive around, not following the set rules