Drinking Up the Dregs of My Brain

End of the year. My brain is all over the place. Forgive me, denizens, if I fail to make sense.

Lots of flotsam, pushing at the edges of my noodly noggin, clawing for the chance to see the light of the lair.

If Scooby Doo had a sister, would her name be “Booby Doo”?

See that? That’s the kind of shiznit I would post if I had a Twitter account. Kind of makes you glad I don’t, eh?

My ImagiFriendsTM tweet. They tweet lovely, silly geekery that makes me giggle gloriously while glugging raktajinos spiked with rum. Don’t follow? Don’t worry. Spliff on this tweet:

Most people don’t realize Janeway’s voice is pure molten sex.

janeway

Oh HELLS yeah.

Award for most awesomest tweet of the year? Make it so. Even if tweeted in jest, it makes me that much prouder of my Janeway impersonation. Not that I do such a thing. Or would ever record doing such a thing for others to hear.

Heh.

Do any of you ever get the feeling that you’re only getting part of the picture when you come here to the lair? Like it’s a little window that doesn’t show you even half of what’s going on. In the night. In the dark. There’s a whole lot more going on in the shadows…you just have to wait for me to invite you deeper.

I’m not feeling fa-la-la-festive just yet. Where’s Dr. Noel when I need a little injection of holiday cheer? Oh yeah. Kirk found her under the mistletoe. Guess he’s decorating her Jefferies tube now. Where does he store that photon torpedo?

OMG, Trexual innuendo!

I’m usually surly around this time of year. I don’t know why. I suppose I’m an emotional Scrooge in some ways. Mmm, portmanteau: Scrooge = Screw + Gouge. Did I impress anyone with my word nerdery just then? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

I used to decorate my door here at work. Truth? I only did it for the Benjamins. Well, the door prize, really. I only won once though. Want to see the sexy that won?

bouncerrudy

He’s Rüdolph, the muscly reindeer bouncer at Klub Kringle. And, yes, those are umlauts over his “U.” A club bouncer must had a tough name, and all heavy metal fans know that nothing screams “tough” louder than umlauts.

Here’s a shot of the full door design:

klubkringle

Thank the prophets for cosmetic cotton balls, that’s all I’m sayin’. Best part? I saved Rüdolph. He hangs behind my door all year long. I get to see his adorable red-nosed profile every work day. And then, BAM! Instant holiday cheer when I move him back to the front of the door for the month of December. Packratness makes it that much easier for me to embrace my inner lazy. W00ts!

Oh noes. My oatmeal has congealed. Guess I’ll have to finish off my breakfast with some fruit. In the mood for a sweet apple all of a sudden…