I have a horrible confession: I kept a big secret from you all this weekend, and I did it intentionally. This past Saturday, July 11, was Free Slurpee Day at 7-Eleven. You could go into any 7-Eleven Convenience Store anywhere in the country and get a free 7.11-ounce Slurpee (get it? Free 7.11-ounce Slurpee at 7-Eleven on 7/11? Clever, eh?).

Why didn’t I tell you? Because I didn’t want to run the chance of you standing between me and my free shot of Slurpee Love. Yes, I’m serious. No, it’s not rational. I don’t care. You have no idea how excited I was about Free Slurpee Day. I have forgotten every single damned time ever since I first learned about it about 2 or 3 years ago. This year, I was NOT going to forget. I did everything short of branding the date onto my forearm.

I love Slurpees. They are the most syrupy-sweet, sugar-packed, enamel-rotting, brain-freezing, diabetic-coma-inducing cup full of high fructose happiness ever. I used to drink them all the time. I also used to be two clothing sizes bigger than I am now. Needless to say, it’s been probably more than a decade since the last time I had a Slurpee fix. As much as I miss them, my waistline is grateful for the moratorium.

So why open the door? Uh, hello? Did I mention they were free? And yes, I said they. I went to two different 7-Eleven stores that day. I’m not ashamed to admit it. And they were delicious. I had one blue raspberry and one wild cherry/cola combo, which was always my favorite choice when I was a Slurpee junkie.

I fantasized all day Sunday about finding a 7-Eleven that was extending the free Slurpee day to encompass the whole weekend. But I didn’t go back into any of the stores. I kind of like fitting into my clothes a little more than I like that sugar rush.

Guess I’m just going to have to wait until next year to satisfy my itch. And now you all know about the free treat, too. Just one warning: Don’t get in between me and that Slurpee machine. We don’t want any incidents on such a happy day, do we?