I make no secret of the fact that I hate dolls. I think they’re creepy as sin. Only nowhere near as fun. <\/p>\n

When I was little, relatives insisted on buying me dolls for Christmas…you know, because I’m a girl. And girls are supposed to want to play with dolls. It’s good training for when we grow up and have real babies. <\/p>\n

…<\/p>\n

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. The road to my personal hell is paved with creepy plastic baby effigies. Like Baby Laugh-A-Lot. At least, I thought that was the name of this particular doll from my past. She was creepy and blonde and when you squeezed her, she giggled uncontrollably for about a minute and then sighed, “I wuv you.” <\/p>\n

Yeah, I bet you do, Baby I’m-Gonna-Snap-Your-Neck-While-You-Sleep.<\/p>\n

However, when I looked up “Baby Laugh-A-Lot” on YouTube…I came across this: <\/p>\n

[youtube http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=FtnESCiZRnw&w=640&h=480]<\/p>\n

Sweet Baby Meat Jesus, this is even creepier than the doll I had! Who the hell would buy this for anyone, let alone someone they supposedly cared about? This doll is one step away from being a Twilight Zone<\/em> episode.<\/a><\/p>\n

Now if you’ll excuse me…I’ve got a corner I need to go rock quietly in…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I make no secret of the fact that I hate dolls. I think they’re creepy as sin. Only nowhere near as fun. When I was little, relatives insisted on buying me dolls for Christmas…you know, because I’m a girl. And girls are supposed to want to play with dolls. It’s good training for when we […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[221,222,223],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9402"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9402"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9402\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9402"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9402"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lobablanca.com\/blog09\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9402"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}