Captioning Horror

Will Smith, second from right, walks on a street in Beijing. His son Jaden is co-starring with Jackie Chan in a remake of The Karate Kid called Kung Fu Kid. Dad Will is a co-producer of the film.

See, the actual photo that matches this caption doesn’t even matter. It’s a craptacularly grainy paparazzi shot that really would only appeal to the most die-hard Will Smith fans. I am not one of those people.

I am, however, one of what I’m sure are thousands (possibly even millions) of people horrified by this caption. Kung Fu Kid? Are you friggin’ kidding me? Please, someone sweep the leg before Hollywood remakes every movie ever made.

As pathetic as it is, though, we have no one to blame but ourselves. We keep going to these remakes, reboots, regurgitations, re-whatevers. All Hollywood needs to see is even the slightest glimmer of a profit and they’re convinced they’ve got a winning formula. Doesn’t matter that the formula tastes about as disgusting as pabulum, as long as we keep swallowing it, they’re going to keep mixing it up.

I think one of the most disheartening remakes that I have heard of recently is A Nightmare on Elm Street. I think that recent remakes of Halloween and Friday the 13th have proven that more is less, and lightning really doesn’t strike more than once (with the exception of Star Trek: The Next Generation, of course).

I suspect I’m not the target audience anymore anyway. Actually, I suspect I never have been the target audience of anyone beyond places like Intergalactic Trading Company and Diamond Select Toys. It is what it is. Here, however, is my own crack at captioning another shot I passed across during my pre-work Interwebz perambulation. Hope you enjoy!

<img src="http://www.lobablanca.com/blog09/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/blanchfox.jpg" alt="Cate Blanchett begins to seriously regret her request to sit in the cheap seats…” title=”blanchfox” width=”424″ height=”459″ class=”aligncenter size-full wp-image-1247″ />
Cate Blanchett begins to seriously regret her request to sit in the cheap seats...

Webmaster? Stain Master!

Ever wonder why the Berber carpet used in most office workplaces is the most heinous looking kaleidoscope weave imaginable? It’s so when your red-dyed soda explodes all over the place the minute you pop the tab, no one’s really going to notice. It just blends right in with all the other garish color splotches. Who knows, maybe that’s how they make this carpet in the first place.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, this post was brought to you by the word “Procrastination.”

spilldoctor

A Piece of the Action (Figure)

Tricorder readings show no signs of our dignity, Doctor.
Tricorder readings show no signs of our dignity, Doctor.

“Hi, my name is Loba and I’m a geekaholic.”

And today I am here to plug one of my favorite geekanalia makers: Diamond Select Toys. This company makes some of the most brilliant action figures I have seen in a very long time. The quality is comparable to the McFarlane figures that were huge in the 90s (remember the Masters of Horror line?), but with the added greatness of 20-point articulation.

(In Pakled Speak that means that these figures are really fun to pose 😉 )

The Diamond Select figures are slightly more than double the price of the old Playmates Trek figures from the 90s. But it’s so worth it. As much fun as those Playmates figures were (and I should know since I’ve got a shoebox full of them), they were more like cartoon versions of the characters. These Diamond Select figures are far more detailed.

I only have a few right now…but the force is strong in this one. I don’t know how much longer I can resist (you know what they say about resistance in the Trek world). Plus, Diamond Select has an equally amazing Battlestar Galactica line that’s also got me salivating, especially the short-haired Starbuck and the Admiral Cain.

[Hint dropped in 3…2…1…]

I don’t have any BSG figures yet…

😀

Distant or Daydreaming?

Make sure you stay hydrated as the dog days of summer approach!
Make sure you stay hydrated as the dog days of summer approach!

I found out a while ago from a coworker that there were people on-staff who were afraid of me. When she named them, I didn’t even know who they were

Casual Baturday

Dude.  I told you today was blue and gray casual uniform day.
Dude. I told you today was blue and gray casual uniform day.

So today has been really groovy. It’s beautiful here in Lobalandia, with cerulean skies and lots of sun. Played a little tennis, went hiking around a lake. Not a bad way to spend a Baturday. Oh, and to the gentleman who kept watching me peripherally in the store as I was molesting the bags of brown sugar, no, I’m not in some way impaired. I just like the way brown sugar feels when you shmoosh it. You should try it sometime. You might like it, too.

Zen Runner

zenrunner

Methinks today is going to be quite a busy, lair-free day, but I thought I’d start my morning with a “geek still life” shot from my desk here at work. Enjoy!