I came home to find this postcard stuck in between our door knob and jamb:
Month: October 2009
Flashback Friday: Freddy Krueger
So since it’s the month of Halloween, one of my favorite holidays of the year, I’ve decided to dedicate all of October’s Flashback Fridays to celebrating some of my favorite scary things. And to kick this special month off, I’m going with my all-time favorite “snappy comeback” horror movie villain: Freddy K.
I love Freddy Krueger. The original A Nightmare on Elm Street remains one of my favorite scary movies and one of Wes Craven’s greatest contributions to the horror genre. I’d even argue that all the Elm Street movies are worth watching at least once, if only for the sheer enjoyment of watching Robert Englund camp it up as our favorite razor-clawed burned baddy. Okay, so you might want to skip Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare. When the special guest appearances are Tom and Roseanne Arnold, you know you’re not witnessing great cinema.
Even at the worst moments of the series, Englund’s portrayal of Freddy kept me coming back. I remember the first time I watched the Elm Street series. I’d saved up a couple weeks’ allowance and rented all the current movies at the time, which were 1-5. I watched them all back to back to back…to back to back. Even as cheesy as they were, that’s a little too much Freddy Fright at one time. It was a jumpy evening for me. But it also got me hooked on Krueger.
I’ve seen all the original series of movies at least five times each, and I own movies 1, 3, and New Nightmare, which I still think was a pretty cool re-imagining of the Freddy Krueger mythology (geek tangent: I also own a replica of Freddy’s glove as well as the Todd McFarlane “Movie Maniacs” figure). I’ve yet to see Freddy vs. Jason though. There’s a bit of a hurdle there, but I’m not sure what it is exactly. Maybe it’s Jason Voorhees. I’ve never really been a big Friday the 13th fan, although I do dig the first one.
As for the upcoming Nightmare on Elm Street remake? It’s already dead to me. Maybe Jackie Earle Haley will do a spectacular job as the new Freddy Krueger, but I don’t care. He’s not Robert Englund…and Robert Englund was the reason that I kept coming back, sequel after sequel after sequel. How else can you explain the endurance and popularity of a character who was burned to death by angry parents for being a child murderer? It was a good deal in part to Englund and his ability to chew scenery to a sloppy pulp and spit it at you with a campy bon mot and a laugh right before he gutted you like a fish.
So GenY can have Haley’s Freddy. I’m sure they’ll love him. Obviously, there truly is no accounting for taste 😉
As for me, I’m sticking with the original. Here’s a little run-down of all the killings Freddy did during his reign over Elm Street, along with some of his snappier accompanying commentary. There are some classics in this bunch, I tell ya. Remember Johnny Depp’s “fountain of blood” death from the first movie? Yumm-o! The one that always makes me cringe is the “puppet master” death from the third movie, while the “cockroach” death from the fourth movie always makes me laugh. All in all, not a bad run.
CS…Why?
Yes, I have categorized this one as both happy and surly. It’s happy because I used to love CSI. I started watching reruns on SpikeTV almost 6 years ago. I’ve seen all the episodes since then, purchased several seasons on DVD, and continue to watch new episodes today.
The surliness comes from the noticeable deterioration of the show. What made me love it was the plot focus. It reminded me in so many ways of the “Freak of the Week” formula used with such success by early seasons of The X-Files. Each week we got to watch the team solve a different case, learning a little about them along the way as the opportunities arose to reveal such information.
Now, it’s all about the characters…or, more precisely, character drama, which I find so very boring. Yet I continue to watch the show. It’s kind of like how I continue to read post-Nemesis TNG novels, even though they only serve to irritate and disappoint me. I’m too much a creature of habit in this regard. But I did like CSI once, and I guess I’m holding out hope that I’ll like it again.
So far, it’s not happening that way with Season 10. I find this truth even more disappointing based on the absolutely awesome way the 10th season started. The pre-credits teaser for this episode was one of the most spectacular I think they have ever done for this show. Check it out:
Pretty spiffy for regular television, eh? I liked it so much that I watched it twice that night…and several times since. I laughed when I saw Laurence Fishburne doing his Matrix shtick with the Agent Smith-looking character, complete with Matrix bullet effects around him. I also dug how the sequence ends with two characters in frame, one of whom is the surprise guest return of Sara Sidle. So, cool opening and pleasant surprise ending. Left me feeling quite hopeful about what was to come.
Too bad the rest of the show in no way lived up to that opening. Petty bickering, bruised egos, the disappearance of a regular character from the previous season explained away by the revelation of even more discord. Plus, the story was meh. The stories from early CSI were never meh.
Same thing for last night’s new episode. Sara Sidle is still with the team, which makes me happy…but what didn’t make me happy was the dredging up of a storyline they started way back in the very first episode as one of the stupidest red herrings I think they’ve ever pulled. Also, it seems that they might be launching another serial killer story arc. Because the Miniature Killer was SO awesome.
Disappointed.
So, should I just stop watching? Give up and abandon ship before it sinks beneath the weight of its increasing mediocrity? Or should I continue to hold out hope that they’ll find that miracle fix that will get the show back on track to awesomeness? Is that even possible?
I’ll probably keep checking in, especially since our cable company makes it so easy to catch up on missed episodes through their On Demand feature. What can I say? I really am a hopeless optimist. How else can I explain the fact that I still watch a show that stopped being great at least three seasons ago…or why I recently ordered the follow-up to a TNG book that I rated only 1.5 out of 5?
Hopeless.
50BC09: Book Number 35
I have several ImagiFriendsTM who are really into zombies. Into them to the point that they’ve thought about the zombie apocalypse…and they have game plans for how to deal with said event.
I dig zombies, too, although maybe not quite as much. So it was with mostly equal parts joy and trepidation that I dove into Jonathan Maberry’s novel Patient Zero. The trepidation stemmed from the fact that I’m usually not drawn to good guy/bad guy shoot-em-up novels all that much. Unless the weapons are phasers. Then I’m cool.
I was happily surprised for the most part. Maberry sets a quick, solid pace and lays down a story that is both captivating and highly unsettling. The latter might be a mostly subjective reaction that stems from the hooks he sinks into the realism of a post-9/11 world. Granted, zombie warfare is a bit far-fetched, but shadows of biological warfare and further terrorist attacks on American soil tap into a wellspring of real fear that, for me, does not make for pleasant reading.
However, Maberry spins a tale that is enough of a m
Complete and Total Barf-O-Rama
I haven’t really brought you much in the way of useful information lately, have I? My bad. So here’s a little advice from your friendly neighborhood Loba: Don’t trust Lactaid Fast Act.
For those who don’t know, Lactaid is a non-FDA-approved over-the-counter pill marketed to those with lactose intolerance. It’s designed to provide the body with the enzyme lactase, which said intolerant people lack, to break down lactose properly.
What the makers of Lactaid fail to mention is that some people will have a very negative reaction to this pill. And by negative, I mean the pill will make those people reenact the “Barf-O-Rama” scene from Stand By Me.
Thank the Prophets I’m not a lactose-intolerant person (although I can be somewhat judgmental of cheeses based solely on their wax color). However, I have witnessed the agony of Lactaid-induced stomach exorcism twice now by a denizen whose name will be withheld to protect the nauseous.
It’s quite disconcerting on many levels, I can assure you.
The really scary part is that this side effect didn’t manifest itself immediately. Said denizen was able to take Lactaid twice and have nothing but positive results. The third time, however, was most assuredly not a charm…unless you find projectile vomiting to be charming. If you do, you’re a bit dirty in a bad, bad way. Unfortunately, it wasn’t until the fourth time that the puzzle pieces clicked into place and Lactaid was revealed to be the culprit.
The culprit box of Lactaid, however, said nothing about possible side effects including channeling Regan’s Captain Howdy demon. I get that this might deter people from buying your product, but as a company, shouldn’t the safety of your targeted consumers be more important to you than your bottom line? After all, I’ve read accounts of parents giving these pills to their children, and it affected them in similar or worse ways. Shouldn’t this company be held accountable?
Ha, yeah, I know. I forgot for a minute what I was saying. That won’t happen again, promise.
So, there you go. If you’re lactose-intolerant, you might want to keep holding out for that miracle fix. I’m here to tell you that Lactaid ain’t it.
